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Why Mother’s Mental Health Comes First

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September 10, 2025

Jill Gilbert

When you’re raising a highly sensitive child, it’s easy to feel like all your energy gets consumed by their big feelings, intense reactions, and daily ups and downs. But here’s what often gets lost in the shuffle: your well-being is just as important as theirs.

Too many moms put themselves at the bottom of the list believing they don’t have the time, space, or even the right to focus on their own needs. The problem? When moms mental health is neglected, it doesn’t just leave you drained; it directly shapes how your child experiences safety, regulation, and connection.

That’s why prioritizing your own care isn’t indulgent, it’s essential. This article will walk you through why your mental health matters so much, and give you practical, doable strategies for keeping yourself grounded while supporting your sensitive child.

The Unique Challenges of Raising a Highly Sensitive Child

Highly sensitive children experience the world more intensely. Everyday things like clothing tags, loud noises, or a sudden change in plans can lead to big emotions and meltdowns. These intense reactions often leave moms feeling overwhelmed, isolated, and unsure of how to respond.

Sensory triggers like loud noises, bright lights, or even scratchy clothing can feel overwhelming for a highly sensitive child. Their reactions might look “too much” to others, but what’s really happening is a nervous system that’s processing the world on high alert. Recognizing that their behavior isn’t manipulative—it’s their body’s way of saying, “this is too much for me right now”—is the first step toward building more compassion. When you can see the root of the struggle, it shifts the way you respond and allows space for both you and your child to feel calmer, safer, and more connected.

Why Prioritizing Self Care is Essential

You may have heard the phrase “you can’t pour from an empty cup.” It’s not just a cliché, it’s neuroscience. When you are emotionally and physically depleted, your ability to co-regulate with your child diminishes. That’s why prioritizing self care isn’t optional; it’s survival.

Self care for moms isn’t about spa days or expensive retreats (though those are nice). It’s about small, consistent practices that restore your nervous system so you can show up as the grounded, calm presence your child needs.

Actionable Strategies for Mental Health Support for Mothers

Build Daily Regulation Routines

Your child isn’t the only one who needs tools for calming their nervous system—you do too. When you’re constantly surrounded by big feelings, it’s easy for your own body to slip into fight-or-flight mode without you even realizing it. That’s why creating simple, repeatable regulation practices is so important.

Start small: pause for three deep breaths before responding to your child, or step outside for a quick walk to reset your body. Even tiny moments like stretching, drinking water slowly, or listening to a calming song can bring your stress levels down. At the end of the day, try journaling for five minutes about what felt hard and what went well—it’s a simple way to release tension and shift perspective.

Grounding exercises are another powerful tool. For example, use the “5-4-3-2-1” method: notice five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste. Practices like this pull your attention away from overwhelm and back into the present moment.

The key is consistency. Just like brushing your teeth, these routines work best when they become part of your daily rhythm. Over time, you’ll find it’s easier to stay calm and steady in the middle of your child’s storms because you’ve trained your body to know what regulation feels like.

Create Space for Self Care for Moms

Even 10 minutes a day can make a real difference. The trick is to think of self-care as small, consistent deposits into your energy bank—not a once-a-year getaway. A short walk around the block, listening to a favorite podcast while folding laundry, or setting a firm boundary around turning your phone off at night all count as self care for moms. These little shifts may feel minor, but they add up over time.

The key is to choose activities that genuinely recharge you, not just fill time. For some moms, it might be reading a chapter of a book with a hot cup of tea. For others, it’s movement—stretching, yoga, or dancing in the kitchen for five minutes. Sometimes it’s simply sitting in silence without anyone needing you. What matters most is that you honor it as your time.

Protecting these pockets of space reminds you (and your family) that your needs matter too. When your child sees you prioritizing self-care, you’re also modeling balance and resilience. They learn that taking care of themselves is just as important as caring for others. Over time, this not only helps you feel less depleted, but it also lays the foundation for your child to grow up with healthier habits around rest, boundaries, and emotional regulation.

Seek Out Mental Health Support for Mothers

Sometimes, small daily resets just aren’t enough. When the weight of constant overwhelm, worry, or exhaustion starts to feel unmanageable, reaching for outside support can make all the difference. Therapy with a counselor who understands motherhood or child development can give you new tools, perspective, and a safe place to process the harder moments.

Support groups—whether local or online—offer something equally powerful: connection. Hearing “me too” from another mom walking a similar path can ease the isolation and shame that so often creep in when you’re struggling. Parenting workshops or courses can also provide practical strategies while reminding you that you’re not failing—you’re learning, adapting, and showing up.

Seeking professional or peer-based help isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a form of strength. It means you’re building a team around you so you don’t have to carry the weight of motherhood alone. Investing in your own mental health support for mothers doesn’t just help you—it gives your child the gift of a steadier, more supported parent to lean on.

Strengthen Your Support Systems

No mom is meant to do this alone. When you’re raising a highly sensitive child, the constant emotional intensity can leave you feeling drained, isolated, and second-guessing yourself. That’s why having a support system—big or small—is essential.

Start with the people already in your life. Maybe it’s a friend who listens without judgment, a family member who can take the kids for an hour, or a neighbor you can swap favors with. Don’t be afraid to ask directly for what you need, whether that’s a meal, childcare, or simply someone to talk to on a hard day.

Look beyond your immediate circle, too. Parent groups, local community organizations, or online spaces dedicated to sensitive kids can be lifelines. They give you a place to share stories, vent frustrations, and swap strategies with people who truly understand what you’re going through.

Support doesn’t always have to be emotional, it can also be practical. Hiring a babysitter, carpooling with another parent, or setting up household systems that ease your workload all count as building support. Each layer you add reduces the pressure on you and makes daily life more manageable.

When you strengthen your support systems, you send yourself a powerful message: you don’t have to carry this all alone. And when you feel held and backed up, you have more energy, patience, and compassion to give your child—without burning yourself out in the process.

How to Fit Mental Health Practices Into a Busy Schedule

One of the biggest challenges for mothers is finding the time. Between school runs, work, meal prep, and the constant unpredictability of life with a sensitive child, self-care can feel impossible. But prioritizing your well-being doesn’t always require big chunks of time. You can weave small, consistent practices into your day.

Here are a few ideas:

  • Morning reset: Before checking your phone, take two minutes for deep breathing or gratitude journaling.
  • Built-in breaks: Pair something you already do—like making coffee—with a calming ritual, like stretching or listening to music.
  • Micro-moments: Use transition times (waiting in the car line, during a shower) to ground yourself with a calming thought or mantra.
  • Evening wind-down: Replace doomscrolling with a short routine that signals rest, like reading, tea, or light stretching.
  • Ask for help: Trade childcare with a friend, delegate a task, or let something go so you can reclaim a pocket of time.

Consistency matters more than length. Ten minutes every day is far more powerful than one hour once a month. And when you treat these practices as non-negotiable—like brushing your teeth—you’ll notice the difference in your energy, patience, and ability to respond calmly to your child.

Why Supporting Moms Benefits Everyone

When moms thrive, families thrive. It’s that simple. By prioritizing your mental health, you create a ripple effect that benefits not only you but your child, your partner, and even your wider community.

When you’re regulated, your child feels safer and more grounded, because kids borrow calm from the adults around them. Your relationships become stronger too—less conflict with your partner, more patience with siblings, and more capacity for joy in everyday life.

Taking care of your own needs also models something invaluable for your highly sensitive child: that self-respect and boundaries are part of a healthy life. When they see you practicing self care and asking for help when you need it, they learn it’s okay to do the same. It shows your child how to build resilience and compassion from the inside out.

FAQs

How do you parent a highly sensitive child?

Parenting a highly sensitive child starts with understanding that their intense reactions are not misbehavior but a reflection of how deeply they experience the world. Approach them with patience, empathy, and consistency. Create routines that help them feel safe, give them plenty of downtime to recover from overstimulation, and use gentle discipline that focuses on teaching rather than punishing. Most importantly, regulate your own emotions first. When you stay calm, it helps your child learn to calm themselves.

Are highly sensitive children neurodivergent?

High sensitivity itself is not considered a form of neurodivergence—it’s a temperament trait found in about 20–30% of the population. However, some highly sensitive children may also be neurodivergent (for example, they may have ADHD or autism alongside their sensitivity). The key is to recognize your child’s individual needs, rather than trying to label them one way or another. Sensitivity is a normal, natural trait that comes with unique challenges and strengths.

How do you set boundaries with a highly sensitive child?

Setting boundaries with a highly sensitive child requires a balance of firmness and compassion. Be clear and consistent about expectations, but deliver them in a calm and gentle way. Acknowledge their feelings—“I know this is hard for you”—while holding the line—“and we still need to leave the house now.” Visual schedules, countdown warnings, and routines can soften transitions. Remember: boundaries help sensitive kids feel safe, not restricted, when they’re delivered with empathy and predictability.

How do you parent a highly sensitive person?

Parenting a highly sensitive person—whether child or teen—means respecting their need for rest, quiet, and emotional processing. Give them space to recharge after busy or overwhelming experiences, validate their feelings without minimizing them, and encourage their strengths like creativity, empathy, and attention to detail. Avoid shaming them for being “too sensitive.” Instead, teach coping tools (deep breathing, journaling, movement) and help them see sensitivity as a strength rather than a flaw. Your role is to guide, support, and model balance so they can navigate the world with confidence.

Conclusion: You Deserve to Thrive Too

Raising a highly sensitive child will stretch you in ways you never imagined. It’s beautiful, yes—but it’s also relentless at times. And in the middle of the meltdowns, the exhaustion, and the constant second-guessing, it’s easy to forget that you matter too.

Your mental health is not optional. It’s the foundation on which your child’s sense of safety and connection is built. When you choose to prioritize self care and seek out mental health support for mothers, you’re not stepping away from your child—you’re stepping toward a healthier, stronger version of yourself. That’s the version of you your child needs most.

The truth is, your child doesn’t need flawless parenting. They don’t need you to have all the answers or get it right every time. What they need is you—present, steady, and human. They need to see that regulation, balance, and resilience are possible, even when life feels messy.

So let this be your reminder: caring for yourself isn’t selfish, it’s essential. You deserve rest. You deserve support. You deserve joy. And when you thrive, your child doesn’t just survive the storms of sensitivity—they learn, by your example, how to thrive too.

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